Final Thoughts and Days in Nepal

As many of you know today marks the end of my time in Nepal, I will be flying for the next 26 hours arriving in Michigan Wednesday morning. These last few days have been a compilation of ambivalent emotions, leaving my last placement, bungee jumping, and staying in the volunteer house with a whole NEW crew of volunteers. I have to say the most challenging part has been not having my "crew" or my usual support system at the house, not that these volunteers aren't AWESOME, but I miss Emma, Anne + Alison, Pieter, Sam, and Anne Zrenda. It is shocking how much you rely on seeing a familiar face when you come back to the volunteer house. But I think this is all the process of preparing to go home knowing those you were closest with have already departed.
I have tried many times over the last several days to express the way I feel with words in my journal, but it seems to be an impossible task to justify with myself, how can I possibly try to explain it to the masses? If you are following me from home and haven't ever been to Nepal or a place like Nepal, how will you understand how sad I am to leave? You probably see the dirt, pollution, poverty....a third world country. I see smiling faces, endless "namastes" from little children, hard working women, men holding hands with platonic affection, and a population of people that have a spirit that cannot compare to anywhere else in the world. Just today the young man running the bus, chatted with me (in broken English) about America, the world cup, and me leaving Nepal. When he dropped me at the temple I was visiting he wished me good luck and blessing, as I was walking back to the main road (which was probably 2 miles or so from the temple) he pulled over the bus just for me, I wasn't even in front of a bus stop. When we reached the main road and he dropped me off, he smiled and waved to me until he was out of sight. Where else in the world would you find people who love that much?
When I let my mind drift over my time in Nepal, I see not only faces of people I love (Shivani, Santoshi Didi, ALL the boys in Charikot, Chaturali Ahma, Prem, Emma, Pieter, Anne/Alison) but I also feel the love they gave me all over again. It fills me up and gives me the strength to come home. These images also motivate me to work hard when I get home, because I know I love this country so much I will be back as soon as I can afford it. Not only did Nepal help me find myself again, but it gave me my drive back....I am now determined to succeed, even if that means only to travel back to Nepal when I can. I worry that when I go home people will not understand this mentality and will not understand what I have experienced, but I have learned in Nepal it is about letting go and being who you ARE. I want to thank you all for following my journey and I will update this as neccessary for when I return to Nepal.